Thursday, June 30, 2016

B Movie Review: "I Come in Peace."

Starring: Dolph Lundgren as Det. Jack Caine, Brian Benben as Special Agent Smith, Matthias Hues as "Bad Alien"

Written by: David Koepp, Jonathan Tydor, Leonard Maas Jr.

Directed by: Craig R. Baxley

So, what do you get when you mix Dolph Lundgren, the guy from "Dream On," and a guy who's spent his career directing made for television cheese fests? You get "I Come in Peace" (a.k.a. "Dark Angel"). On the whole, the flick is mostly composed of a litany of 70s and 80s action movie cliches. Rebel hero cop? Check. Straight laced sidekick? Check. Villain that resembles a failed bodybuilder? Check. Paper thin plot? Check. White collar drug dealers with a fleet of high dollar exotic cars and suits? Yes. I could keep going on. It's a whole lot of been there, done that rolled into 92 minutes. "I Come in Peace" follows Jack Caine and Agent Smith as they try to track down an alien drug dealer. Yes, you read that right. The alien forcibly overdoses people with heroin and then uses a blade/tube apparatus to extract endorphins from their brain. These are a popular, rare, expensive, and highly illegal drug on his planet. He also kills people with a sort of magnetic circular saw thing. Of course, he always makes sure to say "I come in peace" before killing someone. Seriously? What the hell is this? When ISIL Aliens Attack? I've seen a lot of cheesy grade B action flicks that are still somewhat watchable for the unintentional humour factor, but this is just painful. It is the longest hour and a half you can spend outside of "Plan 9 From Outer Space," "Zardoz," or 90 minutes of AreWeFamousNow.

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